Giving up isn’t an option…you’ve got this!

SKIT Intro

How does the saying go? If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans?

Well let me tell you, I had God cracking up when I scheduled this month’s millennial woman interview before we really knew the impact of COVID19. The original plan was to meet in person, but we had to pivot quickly to chat by video.

Why is this worth 20 minutes of your time?

1. Because this millennial woman is beyond inspirational for you as a millennial woman.
2. Because this millennial woman will share how you (parent/grandparent, supervisor/manager, professor, aunt/uncle etc.) can get the millennial woman you touch to listen and seek your guidance.

So, I encourage you to sit, get something to drink and read along!

Who is she?

Sharon Y. Freeman, a 31 year old millennial woman, rooting for the girls doing things they were told only boys can do. 

Sharon is a loving daughter of Sharon and Lonnie Freeman, an encouraging sister to April and Evelyn, a devoted aunt, and supportive friend. Sharon proudly represents her family (aka her support system) as their first-generation college graduate. Currently residing in East Orange, NJ, Sharon earned her B.S. from New Jersey Institute of Technology (NJIT) where she majored in Construction Management Technology (yes, she did that) and minored in Business Management.

Today, Sharon is the Project Manager (yes, she did that again) for Hunter Roberts Construction Group Affiliations: Women Builders Council (WBC) & Greater Place to Work for Women (GPWW). Since 2005, Hunter Roberts’ professionals have provided construction services for over 1,350 projects valued at over $11 billion. This is currently just one chapter in book of Sharon’s life, let’s explore a few more. 

The Dream Chapter

At Sisters Keeping In Touch, inspires (SKIT), we teach millennial women (and those who support her) that one of the keys to living the life of their dream is to envision it often and develop an action plan to make it happen. 

Sharon shared the Personal and Professional Life of her Dreams.

I worked my plan to be financially free and build generational wealth. I have always had a Type A (competitive, highly organized, ambitious, impatient, aggressive) personality so when I chose my partner, I chose a man who balanced me out with his lighthearted, funny, and gentle nature.

Together, we have a minivan, 4 boys and girls and 2 dogs.

As a lover of cars, we also own a pick-up and my deep purple luxury 2 seater baby…!

When it comes to the professional life of my dreams…I lived it my entire career as a Project Manager in the male dominated construction field. When I left the field, I left a mark with my Free-Woman Developers constructed high-rise located in Charlotte, NC.  I envisioned every detail of this building and oversaw its construction. 

The Lessons Learned Chapter

Sharon’s Support System

According to Sharon, there were challenges and advantages as she transitioned from the life of a student to an independent millennial woman. A huge advantage was Sharon’s ability to attend college in NJ and build her life in Jersey after. A full scholarship to NJIT allowed this family oriented millennial woman to stay close to home while enjoying the full college experience by living on campus.

On the challenging end, Sharon quickly learned that she just had to figure some things out (cooking, laundry, prioritizing wants and needs, etc.). I knew I was an “adult” when I bought my first mattress. This was reaffirmed years later when I had to make that first student loan payment (by the way 6 months post-graduation, is not enough time).

Well before graduating college, Sharon credits the woman she is today to the experience she had with Mr. Tony Howell, the former Director of the Educational Opportunity Program (EOP) at NJIT. The EOP offers academic support, career and personal counseling, to first-time full-time freshmen and transfer students. Sharon shared,

I left college my first time around because I thought life was good until I was faced with the reality that I needed a college degree. I made the mistake of walking away; I literally abandoned my class and my GPA to a major hit. I knew NJIT would not let me re-enroll without the support of EOP to vouch for me but Mr. Howell (aka Papa Howell) said, “No.” I couldn’t believe he actually said No, even though I was in tears.

Mr. Howell told me I had to prove that I was serious by going to county college for a semester and get great grades. He was serious and so was I. I went to county college, got all A’s, and secured a spot on the Dean’s list. It was then and only then that Mr. Howell fought for me to be readmitted into NJIT.

Sharon has learned a few things so far in her life and she shares the following advice for other millennial women and their support systems:

If you are a part of the support system of a millennial woman, be patient with us and step back. This is our life to live and our mistakes to make, it doesn’t help when parents or relatives try to live through us, it just stresses us out and it may even cause us to lose focus on our goals trying to please you. Let us breathe, we will figure things out, just be there if and when we need you.

Now to my millennial sisters, first figure out what you’re hungry for no matter what and go after it because it’s yours. If you’re still in school and your grades aren’t perfect continue to do your best and know you can still get a great job after college like I did.  If you have to start the process over again, no big deal, just start over. I was always told it’s not when you finish that is important but that you actually finish.

The Relationship Chapter

At SKIT, we believe it is valuable for millennial women to find mentors (formal/informal) to guide and support her in life. We define mentors as anyone (male, female, rich, poor, near or far) who wants to positively impact the life of a millennial woman and see her win. Sharon shared her mentor thoughts and experience.

At work I have a professional mentor because there was so much to learn. Beyond work, he inspired me to be financially free. He has multiple rental properties, no mortgage and recently bought a brand new car in cash. Since then I try to find additional mentors experienced in building generational wealth.

Ideally, I would like to find a successful person of color in the construction industry to mentor me. There are some challenges I face as a woman of color in the white male dominated construction field that I feel another person of color can help me navigate through. However, a mentor of any race or career field can be beneficial provided they can guide me and enhance the qualities I already have.

According to Psychology Today, a key finding from a major study of adults’ lives was that those who had close, long-term friends fared better than those who were less social. Close friendships enhanced moods and functioning as well as emotional and physical health. At SKIT, we also believe in the value of good healthy friendships. Sharon happily shared the role friendships have played in her life.

I cherish my friendships. As an adult, it is extremely hard to make friends, but I have friendships from elementary school and various organizations in college that I have maintained. At the same time, I have had to let go of other friendships even though it hurts because it was just too painful to hold on. I now understand its part of the growing process.

The ones that have lasted, root for me and I root for them. One of my close friends I still have today was in Kindergarten with me. I lost touch with her for years and then faith reconnected us and we have been inseparable ever since. I have also maintained a friendship with my first college roommate, she is now one of my trusted voices of reason when needed anytime of the day.

As it pertains to romantic relationships, we again turned to Psychology Today as our foundation about why relationships even matter.  In this process, we learned that there are many kinds of love, but many people seek its expression in a romantic relationship with a compatible partner (or partners) and while the need for human connection appears to be innate…the ability to form healthy, loving relationships is learned.  At SKIT, we teach millennial women about the importance of choosing a partner that will help her build the personal and professional life of her dreams.

Dating…whew, I’ve had my own growing pains. In the beginning of this dating game, the most challenging part was trying to predict if this stranger had the potential to be my partner for life. But today, I know what I want in life and I know what I will and will not allow. I am clear I have a partner who shares the things I want in life and who is willing to team up with me to make it happen.

The Final Chapter

Sharon shared some final thoughts on topics every millennial woman should be thinking about.

Money is very important and I’m not ashamed to say it. It can’t buy you happiness, but it can make things easier.  It can provide generational wealth and so much more. I am money minded and believe in having it work for me through my 401K, stock purchases and real estate investment.

My greatest fear is not having a legacy of my own because the life I build may all be for nothing.

My greatest hope is having children of my own and passing down all of my life lessons and accomplishments to them.

I’ll leave you all with this, Sharon said, my process to become a Project Manager as a 5’3” woman of color in the “old school” construction industry was easy and impossible at times. I worked not one but two full-time jobs to before I began my career. In college, I applied to internships for years and I didn’t get one until the summer before I graduated college. That internship was with Hunter Roberts, they saw value in me, and I saw value in them event to this day. 

I am an example that anything is possible, find what you’re passionate about, go after it and don’t give up until you get it. Some days I genuinely cannot believe this is my life. I am the first person in the family to graduate college, I work in New York City, I bought my first investment property before the age of 30, and I drive a luxury car. 

Hard work truly pays off.  So, replace being perfect with having perseverance and get it done.

SKIT Closing: Connect and Support Sharon

It is my/our hope that you have been inspired by this window into millennial woman, Sharon Freeman’s life. I am confident that she will live the personal and professional life of her dreams. Sharon is well on her way and ready to bring her family along with her. Together, we hope her story thus far will encourage you to define you as you live your life and/or support a millennial woman in your life!!!

Contact and Encourage Sharon Freeman on Instagram @ShayYayFree

Education Matters…it’s the Key to Growing and Breaking the Chain

On a crisp winter afternoon, 23 year old millennial woman, Sarah Mack chose to spend her lunch hour with me at my home office.  Sarah works for the Lesniak Institute of American Leadership where they develop the next generation of advocacy leaders. The Institute was named for Senator Raymond J. Lesniak who authored and sponsored hundreds of laws to advance human rights and the quality of life for millions during his 40 years in the New Jersey State Legislature.  It is clear to see why Sarah, an action driven, results oriented persona ready to inspire and change the world is the Director of the Institute.

I am excited to share Sarah’s millennial journey with you.  We both hope you will be inspired and motivated to live the life of your personal and professional dreams.

As we began our discussion, Sarah got comfortable on the sofa and affectionately played with our family dog, Moca.  Sarah has a positive and optimistic energy that emanates from her being before she utters a single word.  This explains why Moca comfortably laid on the floor under Sarah for our entire discussion. 

At Sisters Keeping In Touch, inspires (SKIT), we teach millennial women (and those who support her) that one of the keys to living the life of her dreams is to envision it often and develop an action plan to make it happen.  Sarah shared the life she aspires to have in the Personal and Professional Life of her Dreams. 

Growing up, my home life wasn’t ideal.  I learned from the family of some of my closest friends what a different home life looks and feels like.  My future spouse and I will have children and/or we may even choose to adopt.  Our children will be given time to grow-up without taking on unnecessary responsibilities. Our family will have a strong bond, we will support each other, and we will always have open lines of communication.

Together as a family, our professional and personal lives will have synergy and balance.  Our family will have a life that is enjoyable, challenging and morally righteous in our collective effort to change lives for the better. Lastly, our family will travel the world for fun and to learn how to bring positive change without unnecessary stresses.   

Sarah Mack, My Personal and Professional Dream Life

Now that you have a window into Sarah’s personal and professional dream life, join me in getting to know the Sarah of today. 

In May 2018, Sarah earned her undergraduate degree in Environmental Biology from Kean University in Union, NJ. After graduation and long before that, Sarah decided not to return home after she finished college.  Sarah said, for a number of reasons, home wasn’t the emotionally supportive environment I needed. So, I decided to continue living in the off-campus house my friends and I rented near Kean. 

According to Sarah, there were challenges and advantages as she transitioned from the life of a student to the life of an independent millennial adult.  On the challenging end, Sarah quickly learned that “adults” sometimes behave like children.  Sarah said, I trusted too quickly, I was wrong to think everyone had the same pure heart like me.  At the same time, during her transition, Sarah gained confidence because at times she found that she was more capable of doing the work than the “adults” around her.      

Well before graduating college, Sarah came to the realization that school was the solution for the hard parts of her life.  Initially I hated school, literally my favorite part of school was lunch, Sarah shared.  Then something clicked that education was my way out. I realized, when I was in school, I had friends and teachers that cared about me. 

It got even better when I graduated high school and went to college. Going to Kean was one of the best things that ever happened to me because I was that “big fish” in a small pond.  Kean gave me so many amazing experiences along the way:   

I organized an event which brought together representatives from 15 colleges and universities in NJ to discuss the United Nation’s 17 sustainable development goals. 

• I was published in a peer reviewed science journal and in the chapter of a textbook during my Sophomore and Junior years.
• I spent 3 months in China on a fully funded research grant.

Sarah further credits her college experience for helping her to build a network.  Now that Sarah is no longer a student, she would advise college students to learn about money, how engage in conversation, how to play golf and select good wine.  Through my current job, I meet many people in “high places”, we go to fancy restaurants and talk about sports, wine, and politics. I find important partnerships and decisions are made outside of the office oftentimes. 

At SKIT, we believe it is valuable for millennial women to find mentors (formal/informal) to guide and support her in life.  We define mentors as anyone (male, female, rich, poor, near or far) who wants to positively impact the life of a millennial woman and see her win. Sarah has had personal and professional mentors in her life.

My Humanities teacher Hunterdon Central High School in Flemington, NJ.  He was very challenging but had a great heart for students and is now working with us on a piece of government legislation for students’ press rights. 

• Most of my college advisers were mentors, they helped me choose my major, gave me great life advice and helped me realize that I am an idealistic person who needs autonomy.
• Last but not least, I have my current boss as a mentor…he is just brilliant!

It’s clear to see what helped Sarah transition positively from a student to an independent millennial woman.  Sarah’s advice to other millennial women is simple,

Nobody is going to hold your hand and guide you to your goals.  Stay focused, change your perspective when challenges come up and you will see that the good often outweighs the bad.  Don’t be too proud to ask for help.    

According to Psychology Today, adults with close, long-term friends fared better than those who were less social. Close friendships enhanced moods and functioning as well as emotional and physical health.  At SKIT, we also believe in the value of good healthy friendships. Sarah happily shared the role friendships have played in her life. 

I have maintained a relationship with 2 friends from elementary school.  We talk often and even though one of them now lives in Virginia, we see each other at least every 6 months.  We just support each other, and one even introduced me to church.  I also made good friends in college. I now live with two of them and what I appreciate about them separately is their free spirit and say it like it is attitudes. 

As it pertains to romantic relationships, we again turned to Psychology Today as our foundation about why relationships even matter.  We learned there are many kinds of love, but many people seek its expression in a romantic relationship with a compatible partner (or partners) and while the need for human connection appears to be innate…the ability to form healthy, loving relationships is learned.  At SKIT, we teach millennial women about the importance of choosing a partner who will help her build the personal and professional life of her dreams. 

So, I talked to Sarah about her experience dating at this stage in her life.   I’m looking but not looking, Sarah said, I want someone I can trust, someone who will be there for me, someone going places so we can have productive lives.  My last relationship lasted 4 years, it wasn’t good (she lied and cheated). My parents divorced when I was young, so that scares me.  I am committed to growing and breaking the chain.

As we began to end our discussion, Sarah shared some final thoughts every millennial woman should be thinking about regarding money, hope and fear. 

At the end of the day, I’m still young and figuring it out.What I know about finance so far comes from watching YouTube.

I hate thinking about money because I was pretty much financially on my own since I was 17 years old.  Now that I am working full-time, I have a constant stream of income and my bank account is pretty healthy.  I am always looking at my bank account, checking prices and saving because I don’t want to be homeless.   

Right now, my goal is to invest in a house in 2021.  So, I am working on a money market account for my house, housing repairs.  I am also working on a vacation fund and checking account.

My biggest fears are money, love and failing. 

My greatest hope is that the world will be healthy and thriving by the time I have grandchildren.  I want the world population to be educated to open minds and close the huge education gap that exists.

It is my hope that you have been inspired by this window into millennial woman, Sarah Mack’s life.  I am confident that she will live the personal and professional life of her dreams. Sarah is well on her way and she is open to all the possibilities of life.  Together, we hope her story thus far will encourage you to define you as you live your life!!!

CALL TO ACTION: Contact and Encourage Sarah Mack on Instagram @itssarahmack

Happy New Year and Thank You!!!

As 2019 comes to a close and the new decade is only a heartbeat away, I am grateful.

Grateful for you and your support as I have stepped into my purpose. That purpose is to build an army of millennial women (and her supporters committed) to living the life of her personal and professional dreams.

This year the message to me was clear about my purpose to empower millennial women and those who want to see her win. In 2020, the following two quotes will be the foundation for what I deliver to the world through my public speaking presentations and personal development workshops.

You’ve got mail…

You’re just the mailman. Some days people will like what you deliver, other days they won’t. You have to deliver the mail anyway. So I’m setting you free from the fear of rejection and the need for their acceptance.

Daily Devotional , September 1, 2019

Inky Johnson, Motivational Speaker

Truth without love is abuse. Love without truth is hypocrisy.

Inky Johnson, Secret to Success Podcast

I’m ready for next, are you? Happy New Year!